WEEK 1: SELF-AWARENESS
Knowing ourselves is the beginning of all transformation. Of ourselves. Of our relationships. Of our world.
This is the part where you find out who you are. The part where you stop judging yourself. Where you take off your mask and get out of your own way.
Most of us don’t know ourselves to our fullest capacity. We are all great at acting and putting on a show that everything is perfectly fine because we are afraid that showing our fears, or shame or vulnerability means we are weak. But being aware of these feelings, however painful they may be, and moving gently towards whatever scares us instead of running away is the first step to thriving.
But before we begin, I want to gently warn you that self-awareness can be messy and confusing. Learning about yourself is a wild ride of healing, helplessness, chaos, clarity and awakening.
I started truly learning about myself eight years ago. After spending most of my teenage years in self-destruct mode, I hit rock bottom. And in that moment of desperation and despair I realised that throughout all the years of therapy and treatment, I had been looking outside of myself for someone to tell me what to do, to save me, to fix me. I felt like doctors, therapists, friends and family didn’t understand me or know what was best and, because they were supposedly the experts and even they couldn’t make me better, I would be trapped in a world of anxiety and sadness forever. But they weren’t the experts, I was the expert. And as soon as I grasped this, I began the journey of learning about who I was, who I wanted to be, what my weaknesses were, and what I needed to let go of to be truly happy.
Self-awareness is about having a clear understanding of who we are – our personality, thoughts, emotions, beliefs, strengths, weaknesses, passions and motivations. It includes:
Knowing ourselves is the beginning of all transformation. Of ourselves. Of our relationships. Of our world.
This is the part where you find out who you are. The part where you stop judging yourself. Where you take off your mask and get out of your own way.
Most of us don’t know ourselves to our fullest capacity. We are all great at acting and putting on a show that everything is perfectly fine because we are afraid that showing our fears, or shame or vulnerability means we are weak. But being aware of these feelings, however painful they may be, and moving gently towards whatever scares us instead of running away is the first step to thriving.
But before we begin, I want to gently warn you that self-awareness can be messy and confusing. Learning about yourself is a wild ride of healing, helplessness, chaos, clarity and awakening.
I started truly learning about myself eight years ago. After spending most of my teenage years in self-destruct mode, I hit rock bottom. And in that moment of desperation and despair I realised that throughout all the years of therapy and treatment, I had been looking outside of myself for someone to tell me what to do, to save me, to fix me. I felt like doctors, therapists, friends and family didn’t understand me or know what was best and, because they were supposedly the experts and even they couldn’t make me better, I would be trapped in a world of anxiety and sadness forever. But they weren’t the experts, I was the expert. And as soon as I grasped this, I began the journey of learning about who I was, who I wanted to be, what my weaknesses were, and what I needed to let go of to be truly happy.
Self-awareness is about having a clear understanding of who we are – our personality, thoughts, emotions, beliefs, strengths, weaknesses, passions and motivations. It includes:
- Understanding our emotions, what triggers them and how we can use them most effectively
- Noticing negative thought patterns such as being overly self-critical, beating ourselves up
over how we look, or undermining our abilities - Recognising destructive behaviours and habits including using food, alcohol or drugs to
numb our emotions, over exercising, and overworking - Tuning into our body so that we can access our intuition
- Becoming honest with ourselves about what we want, what is holding us back, and where
we can grow - Accepting that we are responsible for our actions and the direction of our life
Self-awareness is crucial for the simple reason that you cannot love someone you don’t know. Only when you are self-aware, do you have the ability to genuinely love yourself. And because you love yourself, you can be the real you. No mask. No armour. The raw, real, imperfectly perfect you.
Heart-Centred Exploration
This week’s exploration is simple: People watching. Find somewhere to sit like a coffee shop or a park bench, and just watch. As you watch, notice what you are thinking and feeling. Many people find that rather than watching with complete openness, they will be judging, criticising and sizing up everyone who passes. Normally when we judge others it is an extension of the way we judge ourselves, but this self-judgement has become so ingrained that we aren’t even aware that we are doing it. It can be quite shocking to become aware of how critical and mean we can be about ourselves and others, so treat this exploration of awareness as a revelation for the rest of your journey.
This week’s exploration is simple: People watching. Find somewhere to sit like a coffee shop or a park bench, and just watch. As you watch, notice what you are thinking and feeling. Many people find that rather than watching with complete openness, they will be judging, criticising and sizing up everyone who passes. Normally when we judge others it is an extension of the way we judge ourselves, but this self-judgement has become so ingrained that we aren’t even aware that we are doing it. It can be quite shocking to become aware of how critical and mean we can be about ourselves and others, so treat this exploration of awareness as a revelation for the rest of your journey.
Breath-Awareness Meditation
In general, we tend to practise meditation after we have practised yoga so any stress has already been released from our body. If the body is relaxed, it is much easier for us to be still and calm our mind.
In this week’s meditation we simply focus on our breath. As we increase our awareness of the breath, we increase our awareness of our true self – no ego, no thoughts and no anxiety.
Begin by finding a comfortable seated position and close your eyes. Take a couple of moments to simply be and notice any thoughts, feelings and physical sensations, without doing anything about them. Now bring your awareness to the breath. Notice it as it moves in and out automatically and effortlessly. The mind will wander away from the breath to begin with so, when it does, just bring your awareness back to your breathing – letting any thoughts and feelings come and go.
Stay focused on your breath in this meditation for just five minutes today and, if you want to, build up how long you meditate for over time.
In general, we tend to practise meditation after we have practised yoga so any stress has already been released from our body. If the body is relaxed, it is much easier for us to be still and calm our mind.
In this week’s meditation we simply focus on our breath. As we increase our awareness of the breath, we increase our awareness of our true self – no ego, no thoughts and no anxiety.
Begin by finding a comfortable seated position and close your eyes. Take a couple of moments to simply be and notice any thoughts, feelings and physical sensations, without doing anything about them. Now bring your awareness to the breath. Notice it as it moves in and out automatically and effortlessly. The mind will wander away from the breath to begin with so, when it does, just bring your awareness back to your breathing – letting any thoughts and feelings come and go.
Stay focused on your breath in this meditation for just five minutes today and, if you want to, build up how long you meditate for over time.