nicola jane hobbs
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WEEK 7: DISCOVERING YOUR TRUE STRENGTH

When life puts us to the test we all have an unexpected reserve of strength inside of us that allows us to grow in ways we never imagined we could.

Life can be tough. Every day we’re faced with challenges at home, at work and in our relationships. Some days life will knock us completely off balance leaving us questioning whether we’ll ever feel strong again. We can’t always change these situations – the relationship breakups, the redundancies, or the loss of loved ones. But by discovering our true strength we can wait for these storms to pass patiently and courageously instead of being struck down by them.

A greater sense of personal strength is one of the elements that has been found in research on post-traumatic growth. When we are faced with some kind of struggle in our lives, we can treat it as an opportunity to transform ourselves and see the world with a fresh outlook. For example, if we are going through a period of depression, stress or anxiety, instead of resisting it or wallowing in it, this demon can introduce us to new strengths that we wouldn’t have known existed within us had we not needed to draw on them. We don’t need to let worry control us, or stress break us.

I’ve been there too. I spent years completely oblivious to my true strength. I felt like a victim and was desperate for someone to pull me out of my crisis and make me feel normal again. And then I realised that the only person who could do that was me. It was me who had the strength to nourish my body with good food. It was me who had the strength to let go of the worries and the anxieties. It was me who had the strength to rebuild my whole life. And it is incredibly empowering to know that we have the strength to do this – to transform ourselves.

It takes true strength to let go of what no longer nourishes us, face our fears, and work through every other week of this journey. This is why the heart-centred explorations, yoga sequences and meditations are so important. They help us to:

1. Reflect on what we have overcome before:
We often underestimate our true strength. One of the best ways to see how strong we really are is to look back on the times where we have survived storms we never thought we could. This will also help us to see above our current struggles and remind us that we are bigger and stronger than whatever is going on in our lives right now.


2. Be motivated by outer strength:
True strength is about more than how much weight we can lift or how long we can hold a handstand, but in order to feel strong holistically we have to build a foundation of physical strength. There is no separation between our body and our mind, so as we build physical strength through our yoga practice we also cultivate strength within.


3. Develop and nurture a spiritual connection:
Spiritual change is another one of the elements of thriving found in research. Spirituality involves having a sense of connection to something bigger than ourselves so we feel that we are part of something greater. This reduces feelings of alienation and isolation, and allows us to accept guidance and comfort from other human beings, the universe, or whatever higher power we believe in so that we access a source of strength and resilience within us.


Heart-Centred Exploration

One of the first steps to developing true strength is to identify and embrace our natural strengths. We are all good at different things – some of us run fast, others are great at physics and some of us can paint beautiful artwork. 

Two psychology researchers, Chris Peterson and Martin Seligmen, have identified 24 character strengths grouped under six categories so, for this week’s exploration, use the list of strengths below and identify how you have demonstrated this strength in the past. or how you can use it in the future. This will put whatever struggle you are going through into perspective so that it’s not so overwhelming and you can understand that you have the strength to deal with it. 

Character Strengths 
  1. Wisdom: What are you curious about in life? What do you love learning? How are you 
    creative? What advice do you offer friends when they come to you for help? 
  2. Courage: How do you express bravery (e.g. speaking up for what you believe in)? What 
    goals are you working towards despite obstacles and challenges? How are you honest with yourself about your feelings, goals, and relationships? How are you disciplined with yourself so you can feel as energised as you can (e.g. go to bed at a good time, avoid caffeine in the evening, and staying active)? 
  3. Humanity: How do you express love to your parents or children? Your partner? A friend? Yourself? What random acts of kindness do you perform? How are you friendly? 
  4. Justice: What’s your role in a team? How do you express fairness (e.g. by treating others the way you would like to be treated)? Who is your favourite leader and how do they inspire you? 
  5. Temperance: How do you show forgiveness? When friends come to you and share their achievements and accomplishments how to do you react? Do you allow them the limelight? In what ways do you think before you act? What everyday goals like doing the washing up and cleaning the house do you set and achieve? 
  6. Transcendence: How do you show appreciation for the beautiful things in the world (e.g. art, nature, books)? How do you express gratitude? How do you stay positive and optimistic? What makes you laugh? How do you bring an element of the sacred into your everyday life?

True Strength Meditation 

​Sri Chimnoy was an Indian spiritual leader who was one of the first people to bring meditation to the West in the 1960s. He was also a renowned weightlifter and used his lifting to display the inner and outer strength he had built through meditation. In this week’s meditation, we use an aspiration to build strength so that even if we don’t feel strong enough to take action, we can still aspire to. 

Begin by finding a comfortable seated position and close your eyes. Start by developing a feeling of personal strength by reflecting on the strengths you discovered in this week’s heart centred exploration. Embrace this strength in an aspiration such as: ‘May I be strong enough to use my struggles and my joys as vehicles for transformation.’ 

Once you cultivate this feeling of personal strength, see if you can widen the circle of strength to someone you love by using an aspiration such as: ‘May my mum/dad/partner/child/sibling be strong enough to use their struggles and their joys as vehicles for transformation.’ Once you have awakened this feeling of strength for someone you love, do the same for: 
  1. A friend 
  2. A stranger or someone neutral 
  3. Someone you find difficult or offensive 
  4. All of the above equally 
  5. All beings. 

​Spend one to two minutes awakening strength for each of the individuals and groups.  

 © Nicola Jane Hobbs 2017

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